Baby's Current Update

Today marked my baby's 24th day since birth. His doing well now and I believe his weight gain achieved his doctor's recommendation. I fed him breast milk as possible whenever and whatever I can produce. The last time we checked on him, his gaining 2 oz a day which that time he gained 11 oz that doubled his 1 oz recommended gain. From 4.69 lbs his weight on the last check up he was 5.24 lbs. We were thrilled on his progress.

It's not easy to fed a newborn. We would like to have an on schedule feeding but at times you can't really attained that. When we were in NICU he was supposed to fed every 3 hours and our schedule was 1:30am, 4:30, 7:30, 10:30 and so forth but it changed when we got home. His still sleeping when the 3 hour hit and it boiled down to 3 1/2 hour. Then at times he wants to be fed at 2 1/2. It's hard to predict his feeding habits and the amount of milk he will drink. On day of discharge, a nurse fed him at 50ml which was over what he was supposed to. He was supposed to have not more than 45ml. When we got home I stuck to 35-40ml and he progressed a week after to 45ml. It did change somehow on a daily basis and now I estimated him to be at 60-80ml per feeding.

My milk production doesn't meet up the 60ml minimum per pump. I can however produce 30 minimum to 60ml provided I do it early morning during the hours of 2:00 am to 6:00 am with a 4 hour sleep at least. I could not have that very much sleep because it depends on the hubby if he can stay up that long and how patient he is. Other times he will try but frustrations sink in and I could since the baby is stressed. I don't talk to the hubby on what I am seeing and feeling on how the baby is reacting to him so that he won't feel bad and I always make him feel his effort is being appreciated. The offer alone is enough that I won't ever try to make him feel bad towards sharing his responsibility to the baby. His a hands on dad but he doesn't really have much patience on how fussy the baby is. I do somehow already learned from my baby's experience to be calm otherwise I can't make him feel at ease when his fussiness stroked in.

His body temperature is doing very good. He can already regulate and his lowest is at 97.6 and highest at 98.8 averaging to 98.1 on a daily basis. I don't take his temperature in most feeding. When I feel his cold or hot then it's the time I do it. When I talked to his doctor the last time, she said not to overly do it because it will stressed us out. So I did what I was told and it calmed me down. I am really happy on what the baby is doing.

So far this is about it, nothing much to tell except that occasionally we tried to bring him to restaurants and when we read something about when the best to take the newborn out it says about 6-8 weeks. Just a precaution for us with him that went through a lot already in the past 2 weeks, I better let him stay at home first and take it from there when his getting much older.

Emergency to the Rescue

Baby Yanis was discharged on Sept 19 at 11 am at the hospital. We were so excited to be with him finally in the comfort of our home. It's hard to see him poked so many times to check his blood tests and his cry is very difficult for me to hear. I can't do nothing about it, the hospital works that way.

First night was okay. Feeding him is a challenge for me. His still very sleepy when I fed him. I tried every possible way the lactation people taught me in the hospital but at times I can't fed him enough. So during the middle of the night, he will wake up and his cry is very loud. I would also assume that due to his circumcision every time he peed or poo, it irritates his tiny little thing down there. So hard to him his cry but you can't do nothing to soothe it and just hope he would stop crying. But once his cleaned and give him reassurance, his a fine baby. 

The second night was tough. Middle of the night, he was awake every hour. I tried to fed him whatever I can but the little one was always awake. I didn't get much sleep. I was also in pain due to my stitches and hemorrhoid problem so dealing with trying to heal myself with a crying baby is a little overwhelming. 

At 11am we have an appointment in Mountain View for his follow up. Hubby checked his body temp. It was a little colder and so he did skin to skin with him. His temperature became stable then. We got to the facility a little late and the lobby was freaking cold. We waited until our name was called. Then came the nurse and we went to the exam room. We got his temperature it went down to 95.5. It's very alarming. The doctor came in and see if we can regulate his body temp with a warm blanket, nothing happened. His cold. The doctor ordered to go to NICU at the hospital. She also saw the yellowing of Yanis skin probably due to Jaundice. So there we head straight to the hospital in emergency. Quite a panic to have our baby in that situation. 

We got to the hospital and greeted by the supervisor in charge for the day. They then take care of him, put all necessary measuring devices and swaddle him with warm blankets. It's very difficult to see him that way to be there in that corner with all those wires. He was then put in an isolette to monitor his body temp and regulating it. Poor little baby. 

He was in the isolette for 3 days and had 2 days light therapy for his Jaundice. I breast feed him as possible as I can get and bottle fed him too. I haven't sleep so good while I was there. I didn't care much about my recovery because the number one goal was to keep baby stable. I though honestly had a mental and physical breakdown the night of Sunday where the emergency took place. Due to the situation with no idea how the day goes, I didn't bring any of my medication for my pain. I suffered all day while walking the hallway of the NICU. It was so painful I almost fainted but tried to be strong for the sake of the baby. But past 9pm I mentally got to my limit and cried so hard. It was devastating for me to be in the situation where the pain is unbearable and here I have a baby who needs extra care. 

There's a happy ending to every bad things. His jaundice went down and his temp is regular with the help of the isolette and later on he managed to be out on the crib. We were discharge friday morning and went home safe. 

We did have a follow up yesterday to see a pediatrician. His temperature is good. His weight now is 4.69 which is still below his birth weight. The doctor recommend Neosure 22 so he could have more calories and that he can gain weight. Feeding time change to every 2 hours. Breast every 10 minutes each and 10 for bottle feed. We can't make it to 2 hours so we adjusted it to 2.5. It seemed worked fine with me and the baby. He poo and peed every time therefore his doing good. We will see the pedia again next week on Friday and see how far along he can gain weight.  

Induced Labor and Delivery Experience

My primary Obgyn schedule an induced labor on Sept 16. She said I will get a call from the hospital any time of the day within the 24 hour period. Husband and I waited all day and anxious when to get the call. Later part of the day at 3pm, I called the office because I didn’t hear anything from the hospital. Dr. W told me to do so and I did. I Apart from that I emailed her too. I got a response from her and the nurse and said that they were delayed. The doctor said in her email she's in the hospital and she made sure she will get me there as soon as possible when a room is available.

Past 11pm, nothing! I said goodnight to my husband and slept. Until 12:30am Sept 17, the labor and delivery manager called and told me to be around an hour or so in the hospital. Husband and I get all our stuff together, showered and head straight. I checked in at the front desk fill out a little form and Dr. W was there. She gave me a big hug and to the nurses "this is my special patient".  That was a reassuring comment.

I was assigned to room 11. How can I forget! So right away, the head nurse checked on me. Asked question and did the internal examination. I was at 1cm dilated. Wow I was surprised. I was even thinking that my cervix is still pretty much closed. I was not expecting any of it. I did observe a few times on nights I did my walk with the husband that the braxton hicks were getting intense.  So that 1cm then comes from that feeling.

At 2:30am started Cervidil, this helps softens and ripening of the cervix. In labor and delivery this allows the baby to pass through. I had lots of contraction within 12 hours. The nurse removed it at 2:30pm. I was in pain. I also tried to walk with it but it’s so painful. But I tried so that I can prepare my body in delivery. I walked the hallway with the husband and saw the labor and delivery manager from the Child Birth Class. She gave me a hug and told me that I am in good hands. After a chitchat with her, I walked. Every step is like climbing a mountain with grasping every breath and contraction pain is not easy.

3:30pm to 5:30pm Pitocin was administered. The difference of effect now is the longevity of the contraction and the interval of each when it happen. I tried my best to stay relax and calm even if the contraction is getting worst. There’s no way to deal with it but it is how it is. It's better than Cervidil where it's through IV. 

Past 5:30pm I was bleeding with a pool of blood. I didn’t see it actually. I was about to go pee and suddenly I felt the water leaked from my behind. I told the husband to check whether it’s the bag of water. To our surprise it was blood. As what he described it was a lot. The nurse called the on call doctor. She came and checked. She wasn’t surprised and so she raptured the bag of water. Then see how far along I was. Barely at 3cm but the cervix was thinning like a rubber band. Basically, just in the 2’s. I was already in pain. I didn’t know at that point how to take all the maximum pain if labor is going to be very slow for me. 

Came 6pm, the contraction is getting more and more painful. Also every contraction followed the amniotic fluid gushed out. I kept on pressing my left thumb and index finger to divert my attention on the pain. But as the minutes go by, it is getting hard and extremely painful. Couple of times I asked the husband if I can hold his hand when the contraction hit me. A couple of times it helped but later on it doesn't do the trick. The pain is just so excruciating. I told the husband to get myself an Epidural shot. He asked me twice or thrice I don’t exactly remember if I am sure on my plan and I told him I can’t take it anymore. The nurse also asked as to what stage am I on pain and I told her on the 8 and 9 scale. So she requested the doctor to come in and I got it before 7pm. Then the relief came to the rescue. Temporarily no more pain, the lower body was numb especially both my feet.

I tried to sleep but I just can’t. The intense monitoring of baby’s heart rate was alarming. The nurse kept on switching me from right to left. We tried every position to keep up his heart at bay. Every contraction, he will have a big deep. It was very concerning. I am so lucky that the nurse on the shift was so attentive in every detail. She closely watched the readings and asked the doctor’s opinion right away.

Since I got the epidural, I can't go to the bathroom. So she did put a catheter. Later on, the baby's heart is still dropping. She asked the doctor about it and the doctor said to have a heart monitor down there. I have 2 tubes hooked up now. After 30 minutes, still the heart rate is not doing any progress at all. Still keep on dropping in every contraction. The doctor decided to have an amniotic fluid back to my uterus. It's another tube passing my vagina. Those hours I was lying all my heavenly goodness out in the open. Also, she put an oxygen that I could breathe to help not only me but the baby inside the womb. 

By the time her night shift is over, she internal exam me by inserting her fingers to my cervix. To her amaze, she didn’t feel the wall on the cervix but the head of the baby from 3cm to 10cm full dilated just like that. She asked for a second opinion from another doctor and also a different nurse, did their internal exam and yes cervix was in full dilation. 30 minutes before the nurse checked, I asked her for another shot of epidural because I was in pain. I haven’t heard anything from her since then. After the internal exam with a different nurse and they all left, when she came back she arranged the table in front of me. She opened the blue kit full of delivery tools. Dr. J came in later and when she checked on me I asked her why I’m trembling. Hands were shaking like uncontrollably and the abdominal pain is over the top. She said it is the sign of labor and the body is ready for delivery.

The delivery was fast. There were a couple of nurses in front and right of me. Hubby was on my right holding my hand. When the push time came, all of them counted on the first push by 10 sec. I made progress because the baby is getting in the right position. Now, they wanted me to do the second push but making it to 15 sec. I was having trouble in the first push with my oxygen on my nose. They took it out and made real hard push counting to 15. I don’t know how I was able to push that long but I did and the baby is crowning. The third push for 10 sec was already a breeze and baby easily came out. I have not heard him cry right away. He was placed under a warmer. Nurses stimulated him and so the cry came. It’s nice to hear the first cry. He was laid on my chest after a few minutes and we were looking at each other and in silence we both said “we did it”.

Day 8 Since Giving Birth

Just an update, I already gave birth to a baby boy via induced labor on Sept 17. It was a successful vaginal delivery. Baby weighs 4.76 at birth and now his weight is at 4.69. He lost 3% of that weight when we were discharge on Sept 19. But later came back in an emergency due to hypothermia and the evidence of Jaundice on Sunday. He was readmitted in NICU. Stayed there for 5 days and was discharge yesterday. Problem with baby is regulating his body temperature. It was hard at first for us since we don't know how bad it could get to him. Now we are aware of what's going on, we are very extra careful. Hubby bought 2 portable heaters and it did work pretty good maintaining his temp in the 98's. We are crossing our fingers that the NICU will be his last visit. Will update soon and post some pics too.

35 weeks Pregnant

Yes yes yes! Another week has passed. It's always been a celebration of mine every time Tuesday passes by. Today I am 35 weeks and 1 day. I wake up with a heavy heartburn. Last night's blood sugar level was high. I've reached to 154 which I believe was my highest in the record. I went out grab a club bacon ranch sandwhich from Jack in the Box and I ate only half of the bread and my sugar level was in sky rocket. It might have something to do with the food or probably because I was already starving when I ate. After an hour I retested and it went to 136 which was still high and I did some in house jogging in the hopes that by morning my sugar will be stabilize. So I wake up and my sugar is at 91. Not that bad, but not good in my range. I have to be less than 90. It means I will raise up my insulin dosage tonight to 7u. As the weeks getting closer to the big day, my sugar level is acting up too.

Anyway, to sum for the week. Baby's ultrasound last week was okay. Yanis is still below the 3 percentile which I was hoping he could a little catch up some bit. But his interval growth follows what he has been doing for months which was not very surprising for the doctors. This somehow could mean that my induction will be push through on the 16th. I wasn't hoping for the 36 week but otherwise I would love to be on the 37th week so I could get full term and at least baby could grow more and I could spend time with him on my belly. Yet, when I talked to Dr. W yesterday, the date is set and everything. Hubby isn't thrilled to have a Virgo baby. He wants a Libra. Maybe we could persuade one doctor to move to a 37 by our next appointment this thursday but I wonder how powerful we could convince our plea. 

Somehow, my taste buds are not really good. My first trimester symptom came back. Good at least, I don't have nausea. The after taste is just awful. But I still eat what I want in moderation. Though, sugary food isn't possible yet. I tried to avoid it as possible. The least I could get is drinking soda and tea. I tried eating cheesecake too but somehow it elevated my sugar level and it increased my insulin dosage so I have to really watch on food. The hormones are just getting my way of eating the food I want but I know one day this will be over. Just to have more patience about it. 

Energy is up and down. There could be one day I am okay and at times I am feeling tired. The only times I noticed getting tired is when my sugar level goes up. I could be tired, thirsty and will be peeing more. Having gestational diabetes is a challenge to undertake. 

As for baby, Yanis is very responsive. Every time I asked him for a kick, though he might not response right away if his not awake but eventually he will get to me with a kick or movement. I really am satisfied with his favor and I have no doubt he will be fine during labor. The concern of IUGR babies is that during labor they don't like it. Dr. W is trying to tell me in advance the possibility of having C Section in case baby is having difficulty. I am hoping not to get one and I am convincing baby Yanis to really be strong for me on the big day. I hope we could both achieve our goal.

So this is it.. this might be my last post for now or not. Will wait and see what happen next. 

34 weeks Pregnant

Today is the day, a milestone that I don't even know in the past I will ever achieved. But it reveals that miracle do happens. I had my NST appointment today with my primary OB and she's happy and always said that she never thought I could still be pregnant. She never has a patient who's baby is an IUGR surpassed the 34 week but my baby proved them that they are wrong. Baby Yanis is the miracle in the making.

 

Now we are looking at 36 induced. She set me up for Sept 16. For now it's tentative, but it will changed depending on my current status at Maternal Fetal Medicine. My Dr just don't want in the last minute that they can't booked me in for a date in case something happen. But I feel Yanis can go on after 36 weeks. Let's wait and see what my baby will do. So far everything is fine. His active and growing strong with a heavy kick.

33 weeks and 1 day

There are many things to be grateful for and this week is one of them. First is that I thought I could already be in the hospital from Friday's ultrasound. Baby Yanis stomach had past 2 weeks behind. It's going 3 and the Dr. W was so worried. I was almost admitted to the hospital to get the 2nd Betamethasone shot. It require hospitalization until the baby is born. She was even saying I could have the baby a week after. It turned our eyes big that afternoon but instead she called Dr. D discussed the situation and then I was rushed to do NST. Baby passed nothing significant to require we need to be hospitalized. We were so relieved and went home.

Monday I did my Nst for the week with my OB Dr W. Baby passed again on the test. Then, she told me that we will looking at 36 week delivery now instead of 37 week. It was not the news I want again. Why would they keep on moving that. If baby is fine regardless of measurement, nothing could be done if baby is okay inside my womb. I wasn't really happy about it but in the end I take it in. I asked her that it's better for me to work on my maternity leave now since everything I am going through is always at the circumstance. I will never know when I could have my baby delivered because every test and result is different with these doctors. 

Have no energy to wear makeup and all, but to keep my pregnancy photo journal going at 33 weeks and 1 day.

So yesterday I talked to my boss and his very understanding. I will start to stay at home starting Sept 1. That would give me a little time to myself and baby and just relax to prepare for my delivery on the 3rd week. I also suffered from contraction yesterday from overdoing the laundry with Yanis clothes. I didn't know how much clothes he has now. I did it all so I could be ready when his here. 

Also to update on GD, my fasting got worst. I went to see an endo did my exam and administer insulin shot by myself starting Friday night. I started with 2u then on the 3rd day it went up to 3u since on the second day it went up above my original fasting reading when I was diagnosed. Since then, blood sugar in the morning is good. Didn't change my diet and all. Still the same and it didn't change my blood sugar reading good throughout the day at all. I can even eat ice cream sugarless without disturbing my readings. Hehehe.. I know I should not but if it won't affect my sugar why would I suffer myself from deprivation.

I am getting close to 3 weeks now. Soon I could hold my baby and hoping his going to be healthy and could catch up his weight with no problem. That's all I've been praying! 

32 Weeks and 4 days

I have a late updating my status for the week. On Monday, I did an NST with Dr. W. She was so happy to see me at the same time her words where not that encouraging because she said 'Happy to see you, you're still pregnant'. What do they expect me to have the baby early? I am not really so enthusiast on that praise but on the positive side of course it's a good thing to hear that I've reached to this point having still my baby in the cozy womb.

Then I did another NST with her on Thursday which baby is showing really good with the result. Baby is active and kicking and there's no lower number this time. Though I've seen the lows 109 it wasn't that low compare the other times when the machine got to an error or read 70 which scared the hell out of me. Anyway, so we did passed on that. I was relief.

 

Later on that afternoon, I saw my nutritionist and reviewed my glucose chart which somehow lead me to an end result of having to take an insulin. She said all of my daytime numbers are pretty good and I am eating pretty well. The problem was the fasting number. It goes as high as 106 which was above the reading I got when I was diagnosed at 24 weeks of 95. That's a high number and it needs attention. So she referred me to an Endocrinologist the following day.

So Friday which was yesterday, I saw the Endo Dr and she was pretty nice. Did the exam on my skin and all and she said that I am looking good and uterus is the size as normal. She mentioned about the doctor's concerned on the diagnosis of baby being small she said that Asian are really small and their charts are based on white so most likely we would fall into the small or lower chart. She told me not to worry about it and we just have to make sure that the baby is healthy.

She went with the process on how to inject the insulin and give me advice not to lower my carb intake or change my food eating style now since it really work for me. Just have to maintain it and watch how we could progress with insulin on the fasting reading. After I went home, grab some snacks and went to Walgreens to get my prescription.

Later on that day I went to the the Growth Scan with MFM. The result was hadlock is lower than 3 percentile which was not we wanted but in comparison to his growth the last 2 weeks it's his normal range. Weight is a little off but his growing. Placenta resistance is normal and Dr. W a doctor which we just met said to administer steriod which we were not really happy about but before that drastic move she called Dr. D our supposed to be doctor that day and said no. Baby's growth is normal with his status. Had a NSt done again to make sure baby is normal and doing okay. He was okay. So we were let go and no hospitalization needed. Damn doctors, that scared the hell out of us!

So this is my week, a lot of appointments and monitoring but baby is fine. We are both fine!

31 Weeks Pregnant

Today I am 31 weeks and 2 days to be exact. I am the happiest in the world no matter what. I reached to this point. The baby is still in my womb. My prayers are answered and I am continuing to pray until I can get to full term.

I just arrived home from NST exam this afternoon. Eating my afternoon snack. Having gestational diabetes you have to timed your food intake and sometimes even if I am not hungry I just eat. My weight today is 138.6. I gained 1 pound since last week. I guess eating fats work. The portion of food I ate is still the same but I ate more rice for the past 2 weeks. I think that's what makes it. But there was so many spikes I had for the past 2 weeks. I wonder if my nutritionist will going to be happy with that. I will miss an appointment with her tomorrow since it conflicted with my ultrasound so I moved it to next week. I hope by then I can control my sugar level and no spike if possible.

Anyway, the NST exam was good. There was a moment when baby's heartbeat went below 80. I was scared at first but doctor W said it's fine. He passed the test. And asked if I am counting his kicks which I am. Dr. W was so happy to see me and she even said surprised that I am still pregnant. 31 and 32 weeks is a big difference and she is so happy that I am still pregnant and will be her OB until the baby is born. Wow, amazing to hear it! Even she I didn't expect that she's already anticipating I could have the baby soon. Miracle of prayers work. I believe in my faith and God is listening to every bit of it and I am so glad His there for me when I needed him.

All I can say about the past week is that, I feel that my belly is growing and definitely I am gaining weight too. It shows on the belly now and my face is getting rounder too. Baby is growing at his own pace and still behind but definitely his fine.

Food is still a challenge with diabetes and I am having some sweet moments with soda if I want to that won't even hurt my sugar level. At least I could have some. I don't drink it every day only when I am already wanting to get some sweets in my taste. I still have some after taste after I eat. Heartburn is still bad and I found a sugarless Tums for it. The past 4 days I slept better at night. I think this is just what happen for the week. I am happy and satisfied. I am praying for good BPP tomorrow.

30th Week and 2 days Pregnant

Somehow, I can't believe that I passed through this stage. I still have my baby with me and his kicking and moving like crazy now. I just observed that he wakes up on schedule too. But I am glad up to this day, I have a God who listens to my prayer.

An update to my health, well I have abdominal muscle stretching pain above my pubic bone now. I don't know if the baby is growing or my belly is growing. I am measuring myself and I am still at 38 inches for the past 2 months. So I can't tell really. My weight went to flat to 133 for the past 2 months as well. So all in all I only gained 14 pounds with this pregnancy. I don't know if it's good or what but I am hoping that the baby inside is growing. He was 2.10 pounds in his last growth scan. I hope his going to be 3 by now. I hope he is. Tomorrow is my appointment both NST and Ultrasound. I keep my fingers crossed!

For my gestational diabetes update, the last time I visited my nutritionist everything went out good. Except I have to introduce fat to my diet so I could gained weight. She doesn't want anything with IUGR to go worst with my weight not on target. Right now, it's the same. But my co-workers had told me that since last week they saw me, I have gained weight. That makes me happy. I hope that baby is too.

Went to a park yesterday to shoot for a different location aside from home lol - 30 weeks 5 days

Sweet foods are a killer right now. I hated the fact that I can't have one. I just don't want to get anything worst so I don't cave in to my liking. I stick to what works for my blood sugar to be stable. Somehow, someday, I will going to have my sweets again. I am praying that these are all just part of being pregnant.

Baby Shower

Finally I was able to attend a baby shower last Saturday. One of my good friend hosted a party for me. I was so happy to be able to see my friends. Not all came, but I am glad at least I could have seen some. We had a great time and the party was so fun.

Having the shower meant so much. It's hard to tell when I could have my baby boy to be out in this world since I have weekly appointment which somehow could tell me that I could be hospitalized anytime soon and having a shower did make a difference while my baby is still in my womb.

Here's the photos from the shower:

BPP and NST Test 29th week

I did my first BPP in the morning at the maternal fetal medicine department. Arrived on time though parking was a hectic. I was almost not able to make it on time. Check in at the front and still waited for another 15 minutes. My name called in and what they normally do. Get your BP and BP pressure and weight then they let you wait again for sometime.

I got it to the exam room 12noon already. Baby is already sleeping when they had them checked on him. They poked him several times and baby was not so active. Looking at the screen I was kind of nervous whether his alive or something but his just sleeping and won't cooperate that well. But I saw his heart is beating 130 something. He normal is at 146 but his sleeping so he in his 130s. Several pokes done, he was able to make his movement. Saw his breathing as well. I was relief. For a moment, I was so nervous.

Later before 30 minutes, Dr K came in to check and she already read and saw the movements of the baby. She did her own test as well. Everything is stable as she said and placenta is not getting worst which they expect it to go wrong. No change as to what my plan schedule for testing for the coming weeks.

After leaving the facility, head straight to Burger King. Yeah right! No choice, fastfood is not good for gestational diabetes patient but I have no time to find something healthy. Grab some fish fillet eat just half of the bread and eat a portion of french fries. Kiss my honey goodbye after lunch since he can't make it to go with me on my next appointment. I went and drive to the other location for my NST.

Arrived at the building, worried about my sugar level. Instead of using the elevator, I gravitate to walk the stairs. That would make use some of the calories I just ate. Checked in and the nurse gave me a sample container went to the bathroom and did my stationary walk inside for 3 minutes. After doing some of the business, went back to the waiting room. I was able to get to test my blood while waiting and yes blood sugar level went down. Then after 3 minutes, I was called in just about time. Perfect!

The NST went okay. There were glitches when the machine can't read baby's heartbeat and literally it dropped to 90bmp. I was scared like hell. I didn't know what to do. I was thinking is baby will going to be okay or what. But yeah, it happens when baby moves, the machine can't pickup the vibration. It took me 40 minutes to stay in the room because Doctor had to double check his okay. There were 2 actually big flat zero reading and that moment made me scared. But he was okay. I know he was because he was moving and all of a sudden the machine just went blank. Also, the band was too tight on me and when I readjusted it the baby was perfectly fine and the machine did pickup the heartbeat with no problem. Next time, I have to make sure it's not too tight. Lesson learned! But I thought it won't affect the baby's heartbeat yet now I know baby doesn't like it. Will make it to a point next time.

So I guess, everything is fine for now. Thanking God for listening to my prayer and Mama Mary for understanding my heart's concern. Until next Friday test!

29th Week Pregnancy

It's been a roller coaster ride this week. My emotions are up and down. It's hard to be in sane. But for the sake of the baby and I have to think positive, I am trying so hard not to let all this negativity around affects me. Friday's check up with baby was not so good news. Though his been so active and all, but his growth has been consistent to fall on the lower scale. I wish there is a miracle that could happen and he will have his growth spurt but as of this yet he never have one. Someday, I wish there will be.

Despite all of that, baby is very smart to make me feel better. If I ask him something, he would response in his own ways. I love my baby. No matter what, I hope he will come to full term. 37 week is my goal. I hope God will listen to me.